There seems to be two polarised sides emerging to my blogging habits. On the one side, I quite like updating my websites with content that’s useful to others (in the sense that the post is informative and good for reference).

On the other – I seem to have a knack for cracking out experience-infused ramblings that appear from somewhere in the recesses of my brain; I’m not entirely sure at this point whether these sorts of posts are actually useful to the majority of people, but they seem to strike a stronger chord with those that ‘get’ me.

Today’s post falls in the second camp. I got this word. Renewal. I know I’m supposed to write about it – but I have no idea what I am going to say. Woo!

I see that many of us continue to hold this notion of wanting Life = Life of Hopes & Dreams. Of course, for most of us right now, the first does not equal the second. Assuming you know a little about the Law of Attraction then – the idea primarily is to change your vibration in the here & now to match that of your desired life, in order to bring that life into current reality for you.

For some people, this is fine. There are many books out there on how to go about changing your vibration to align with what you want. The thing that’s often overlooked is that this process is only a strand in the fabric of life; not a means to an end.

I’ve learnt this a fairly difficult way – over the course of 2 years I went from having no job, money or home of my own to running my own business and buying a house on the estate I decided I wanted to live on years before. I had the life I thought I wanted for about 12 months.

However, in building this ‘life’, I hadn’t accounted for an important aspect of it – renewal. It’s like building an amazing car, driving off with a full tank of fuel, and only discovering when you’re on red that there’s actually no way of accessing the tank to refill it. That powerful and beautiful car then becomes reduced to nothing but a fancy shell.

Renewal is everywhere.

The Life/Death/Life cycle of nature is apparent as we progress through the seasons of the year – although what we don’t always realise is that this cycle is inherently part of ourselves also. We seem to have forgotten that new life springs from the destruction of old.

We turned the cycle into ‘Life’ or ‘Death’, which creates a situation of having to choose. Having been conditioned to feel fear over the death/destruction/end of situation element, our stubbornness and resistance to change kicks in, which creates more hardship for ourselves.

Renewal is being in flow.

The oak tree doesn’t refuse to shed its leaves because it likes the ones it currently has and doesn’t want to lose them!

Of course, it doesn’t always feel like being in flow at the time. Over the course of a few months, I sort of uncomfortably sat back and watched (couldn’t do much else as I was suffering with Chronic Fatigue during this period…) as everything fell away.

From that moment, I’ve been trying to let go of expectations of how my life should be, and flow with change as best I can when it happens.

Renewal is a cyclical process.

The in/out of the breath; the destruction/recreation of every cell in our body; the destruction of thoughts and beliefs that hold us back replaced by those that serve us better in our present circumstance.

Incidentally , the last few days ‘555’ has been cropping up in various places – here’s an explanation from ‘Angel Numbers’ by Doreen Virtue:

555 — Buckle your seatbelts. A major life change is upon you. This change should not be viewed as being “positive” or “negative” since all change is but a natural part of life’s flow. Perhaps this change is an answer to your prayers, so continuing seeing and feeling yourself to be at peace.

Heh.